Saturday, July 23, 2005
school, the drinking life that i never had, my love relationship with Math, a blessing of princess sleepy, etc.
i loved being in school. because it means i am much better off than many kids who couldnt even get an education even if they wanted to. but i loved school for what it is. i mean im not the kid who just liked school because of the perks that goes with it. by perks i meant "lovelife" you meet at school, or movies after class with your friends....its just my tita and i sometimes talk about highschool, and she was like "ah we go to discos after class" (disco: so ages ago but that was a fad during her time ^^), and theyve tried different things...smoking, drinking...highschool was the best. i loved high school too...but i never had too many memories of experimenting with friends...like smoking, or nightlife, and i rarely if ever go out with friends drinking. just once. angel's birthday. but sis was there. i got rashes for a week. (alcohol is really bad for me. on the rare times that i go out drinking, it almost always turns out bad.) i felt like i missed some things. i never even had a highschool love. i was infatuated with Ral and ive liked some boys but i will never ever know how its liked to be in-love in highschool.
dont get me wrong. i wasnt anti-social. nor was i a geek or a freak. i dont agree but my bestfriend even told me once that she was insecure with me because everybody wants to be my friend. and my Ate was like the big sister of everyone in my class. i loved school and i had many great memories about it but i always took school seriously that i am somehow jealous of those who lived it the happy-go-lucky way.
i was always part of the top students in class. i graduated second honorable mention in elementary and salutatorian in high school. i get perfect scores in some of my tests and i get a little sad when i get ten mistakes out of a hundred and fifty questions. the top studenst get merit cards each grading period of every year (thats 4 times a year). mama would buy me any giftgate/hello kitty bag i like if i was part of the top students, so i always tried to be in it. during my later years in highschool, hello kitty bags became expensive and my being a top student became normal so she stopped the gift-giving ritual. i only get one instead of four each year.
i got the first place in our oration competition, and i was a finalist in our impromtu speech although we never had the final competition (wonder why). i was nominated to be miss alma mater but i was too painfully shy when they interviewed me, that i didnt get it. plus it was just not me to be part of a "beauty and brain" contest-like stuff...i felt it was ridiculous. my teacher made me one of the editors-in-chief of our school paper even if i wasnt really interested in it. i always do my homeworks and my projects. a lot of times i do them during breaks just a few minutes before i have to pass it, but i always finish it on time. i loved Math. i really did. because i thought it wasnt complicated. i mean, if you knew the right equation youll always get the precise answer. and i thought one need not be intelligent to pass a mathemathics class. you only have to have a great memory. you dont have to have opinions because Math doesnt need it. i never missed a class even when im sick because absence was just not an option for me. i even get scared being late. okay im making myself sound like an alien already.
i had too many friends. most of them would even say that at first look i dont seem like a very loud girl but i am. i talk a lot. laugh a lot. especially when im with my class, because some of them ive been classmates with since elementary. i love my afternoon 7/11-slash-misterdonut-slash-hallmarkcards or mcdo rituals with eun, and friends. i love our little experiments in integrators club, like the one where we have to wrap an egg and make a parachute for it with limited materials (a few straws, strings, etc.) and then drop it from the third floor to the ground and make sure it doesnt break. and i love the song interpretations (through slow dancing) the most...i love wearing the costumes and our seemingly endless practices. and i loved it because ate was part of it. i love our foundation days and the field demonstrations. i miss the chirstmas parties and exchange gifts. i miss the short plays. i miss going to a theater play at least once a year. i miss the field trips. i miss buying tofiluk at the bookstore.
i really enjoyed and loved school but somehow being part of the top students...i had been too concerned about my grades that i studied history, biology, etc. not for the sake of knowledge but for the sake of being an honor student. not math though...i felt like i studied it with all my heart. and i was a bit jealous that i didnt join my friends in their little "escapades"...drinking, or that bulacan trip after JS Prom, or billiards. i was always the good and gentle girl that they were even shocked to hear me say "shit" now.
funny. i didnt know how i got to this topic when all i really wanted to say was im gonna start living my life without worrying myself with petty details and just enjoy every second of it. id have enjoyed my classes more if i learned it with a heart that wanted to learn a little more about the universe rather than with a mind set to get an A or an Uno (1) or a 100% in her grade card. but im glad i learned this at 21, not too late to make a brand new start.
and yeah..am too happy because my friend princess sleepy aveline is gonna send me a little present all the way from singapore. a flower accessory ive been wanting for ages. i just think its amazing how a friend i barely know (i mean i read her blog and she reads mine, and we go through the same things sometimes..but its still not enough), could finding something there to like in me to go through the trouble of sending me a parcel. its really making me happy. and grateful. and lucky.
i realized how theres so much knowledge in the world i know nothing of. and although i know i wont be able to learn them all in my lifetime, i just thought maybe i should try learn something new each day. im thinking of learning one sign language, one japanese word and kanji, and one trivia each day. i dont know what has gotten over me. i want to learn a lot. if i had been possessed by this knowledge-thirsty kathleen since i started school more than ten years ago, biology, history, etc. would have been more interesting.
i loved being in school. because it means i am much better off than many kids who couldnt even get an education even if they wanted to. but i loved school for what it is. i mean im not the kid who just liked school because of the perks that goes with it. by perks i meant "lovelife" you meet at school, or movies after class with your friends....its just my tita and i sometimes talk about highschool, and she was like "ah we go to discos after class" (disco: so ages ago but that was a fad during her time ^^), and theyve tried different things...smoking, drinking...highschool was the best. i loved high school too...but i never had too many memories of experimenting with friends...like smoking, or nightlife, and i rarely if ever go out with friends drinking. just once. angel's birthday. but sis was there. i got rashes for a week. (alcohol is really bad for me. on the rare times that i go out drinking, it almost always turns out bad.) i felt like i missed some things. i never even had a highschool love. i was infatuated with Ral and ive liked some boys but i will never ever know how its liked to be in-love in highschool.
dont get me wrong. i wasnt anti-social. nor was i a geek or a freak. i dont agree but my bestfriend even told me once that she was insecure with me because everybody wants to be my friend. and my Ate was like the big sister of everyone in my class. i loved school and i had many great memories about it but i always took school seriously that i am somehow jealous of those who lived it the happy-go-lucky way.
i was always part of the top students in class. i graduated second honorable mention in elementary and salutatorian in high school. i get perfect scores in some of my tests and i get a little sad when i get ten mistakes out of a hundred and fifty questions. the top studenst get merit cards each grading period of every year (thats 4 times a year). mama would buy me any giftgate/hello kitty bag i like if i was part of the top students, so i always tried to be in it. during my later years in highschool, hello kitty bags became expensive and my being a top student became normal so she stopped the gift-giving ritual. i only get one instead of four each year.
i got the first place in our oration competition, and i was a finalist in our impromtu speech although we never had the final competition (wonder why). i was nominated to be miss alma mater but i was too painfully shy when they interviewed me, that i didnt get it. plus it was just not me to be part of a "beauty and brain" contest-like stuff...i felt it was ridiculous. my teacher made me one of the editors-in-chief of our school paper even if i wasnt really interested in it. i always do my homeworks and my projects. a lot of times i do them during breaks just a few minutes before i have to pass it, but i always finish it on time. i loved Math. i really did. because i thought it wasnt complicated. i mean, if you knew the right equation youll always get the precise answer. and i thought one need not be intelligent to pass a mathemathics class. you only have to have a great memory. you dont have to have opinions because Math doesnt need it. i never missed a class even when im sick because absence was just not an option for me. i even get scared being late. okay im making myself sound like an alien already.
i had too many friends. most of them would even say that at first look i dont seem like a very loud girl but i am. i talk a lot. laugh a lot. especially when im with my class, because some of them ive been classmates with since elementary. i love my afternoon 7/11-slash-misterdonut-slash-hallmarkcards or mcdo rituals with eun, and friends. i love our little experiments in integrators club, like the one where we have to wrap an egg and make a parachute for it with limited materials (a few straws, strings, etc.) and then drop it from the third floor to the ground and make sure it doesnt break. and i love the song interpretations (through slow dancing) the most...i love wearing the costumes and our seemingly endless practices. and i loved it because ate was part of it. i love our foundation days and the field demonstrations. i miss the chirstmas parties and exchange gifts. i miss the short plays. i miss going to a theater play at least once a year. i miss the field trips. i miss buying tofiluk at the bookstore.
i really enjoyed and loved school but somehow being part of the top students...i had been too concerned about my grades that i studied history, biology, etc. not for the sake of knowledge but for the sake of being an honor student. not math though...i felt like i studied it with all my heart. and i was a bit jealous that i didnt join my friends in their little "escapades"...drinking, or that bulacan trip after JS Prom, or billiards. i was always the good and gentle girl that they were even shocked to hear me say "shit" now.
funny. i didnt know how i got to this topic when all i really wanted to say was im gonna start living my life without worrying myself with petty details and just enjoy every second of it. id have enjoyed my classes more if i learned it with a heart that wanted to learn a little more about the universe rather than with a mind set to get an A or an Uno (1) or a 100% in her grade card. but im glad i learned this at 21, not too late to make a brand new start.
and yeah..am too happy because my friend princess sleepy aveline is gonna send me a little present all the way from singapore. a flower accessory ive been wanting for ages. i just think its amazing how a friend i barely know (i mean i read her blog and she reads mine, and we go through the same things sometimes..but its still not enough), could finding something there to like in me to go through the trouble of sending me a parcel. its really making me happy. and grateful. and lucky.
caught a falling star @ 10:05 AM
3...comments
3comment:
we can't experience everything we want especially in highschool. me for example, i've experienced being drunk and having a relationship with a girl back in highschool and also playing billiards and stuff or going to the movies after class or on-the-spot swimming trips but i have'nt experienced being on top of the class (exept 4th year)or getting a 90 on math or going up on stage and get a medal for honors. i haven't got the chance to enjoy the simple things in life the way you did, i've took it for granted and i wish i didn't.
youre right. i can only be kathleen. i cant be Joy, or Mohn, or Lene or Angel..i can only be me, and maybe being Kathleen just means doing what i did and being what i am...
This is very interesting site... » » »
By 
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8:29 PM
