last thursday i said bye to two people ive become very fond of.
i cried at yonbansen when the narita express dashed off...but atleast i was with tanhon okaasan when i did. it was really sad. i dont even know if ill ever see them again.
i'll definitely miss having them around. i dont know how we clicked, but somehow we did and somehow we started acting as if weve been friends since ages ago. she'd bully me into doing something i dont really feel like doing and id end up raising my white flag surrendering to her but actually end up enjoying it anyway..like when she forced me to go to akihabara with her kaiwa classmates, or to toys are us at ikebukuro, or down at the computer room during break time when before ive made it a no-entry-as-much-as-possible zone (in my constant struggle to avoid you-know-who), or when she asked me to stay a bit longer and spoil her when she wanted to go back to this mangga shop at akihabara to go get more fruits basket capsule toys. she'd accompany me to combini even when shes been there only minutes ago, she'd (her and laverne) suffer eating boring combini foods with me during lunch with our okaasan....sigh...and i remember when we went to meet up with her at shinjuku south exit (to toys are us) and the moment we saw each other, we ran towards each other and hugged as if weve never seen each other for centuries..and while she was waiting there for us she was like "if only kathleen were here, shed know where this exit is..."
id miss her..im missing her now! id miss our post office and combini trips....id miss having a twin sister. we'd always say were twin sisters, only were a little bit different...her being tall and blonde and all..and me short, black-haired.
she and laverne would always kid me about marrying their brothers...kelly would say you should marry my brother so youd become an american citizen and well see each other often..and laverne would be like you wont die an old maid coz youll marry my brother, he likes someone who can cook but nevermind, he doesnt need to know you cant cook coz ill cook for you. and i would be like, does your brother know your getting him (well them..kelly's and laverne's) engaged to some girl they havent even seen?! aaaahhh, ill miss them both. ill marry either of their brother if i could...but they'd understand why i cant. and im sure theyre only kidding (except that they almost always look serious when they offer their brothers for marriage..^_^)
to the two of you...im sending loads of hugs and blowing ippai kisses (they should arrive there soon)..and im singing a song while doing it (its not how long we held each others hand, what matters is how well we loved each other~~what matters most)
mata ne...!
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How to make a Falling Star |
Ingredients: 1/2 cup of naivety 3/4 cup of laughter 1/4 cup & 1 tsp. of insecurity |
Method: Combine in a tall glass half filled with crushed ice. Add a little cocktail umbrella and a dash of sadness. Sprinkle a bit of craziness (it's not complete without that!). Serve chilled with a smile. And recently, i discovered that if you add a pinch of faith, it'll be a lot better. Yum!*Do not overindulge!* |
When i lost you, I was the one who loved you most, but between us you lost more. For someday I can love someone the way that i loved you but you will never be loved again the way that i did...
everything happens for a reason, nothing happens by chance or by means of good luck. illness, injury, failures, love lost, memories of true greatness and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of one's soul. without the small tests, whatever they may be, life would be like a smoothly paved straight flat road to nowhere. it would be safe and comfortable but uttery pointless...
do not undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others, it is because we are different that each of us is special...
do not let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past or for the future. by living your life, one day at a time, you live all the days of your life...
do not be afraid to encounter risks, it is by taking risks that we learn how to be brave...
do not run through life so fast that you forget, not only where you have been, but also where you are going...
Humankind get bored with childhood, they rush to grow up, and then long to be children again...
We cannot make anyone love us. All we can do is let ourselves be loved.
"If the sight of the blue skies fills you with joy, if the simple things of nature have a message that you understand, rejoice, for your soul is alive." - Eleonora Duse
"This is courage...to bear unflinchingly what heaven sends." - Euripedes
"Hope is faith holding out its hand in the dark." - George Iles
The hardest thing to do is to watch someone you love, love someone else.
Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, then its not the end.
Nobody is perfect until you fall in love with them.
Men are not worthy of precious tears, they just make us look terrible...
Its amazing the things you realize when you lose someone; you get mad at yourself for not saying the things you could've a million times, you take for grantd the days doing nothing when you could have been with them. anyone can be taken at anytime in our lives, but we always wait until theyre gone to say the things we never had the courage to before
Watching you walk out of my life hasn't made me bitter or cynical about love, but rather, it has shown me that if i wanted so badly to be with the wrong person, how beautiful it will be when the right one comes along...
in the movie "in the mood for love," if someone had a secret they didnt want to share, they go up to a mountain, find a tree, carve a hole in it and whisper the secret into the hole...then they cover it with mud, leaving the secret there forever...
this is my hole...