the first months i was here in Tokyo, i almost often send my friends mails about how im doing or just about anything...weird or surprising things about jap. then for months now i stopped writing. i was just not in the mood for mails. but now my mail box (email, that is) is flooded with why-have-you-not-written-for-ages mails. im being missed after all. ^^
which got me to realize: i have many friends. and really close ones...close as in i share not just secrets but dreams with them and they care about me, and i care about them loads too. i dont know if im just too friendly or i just happen to be around friendly people. but isnt it nice knowing that although no one (in a romantic way) will catch me if i fall, theres a bunch of people who will help me heal my bruises and who will pig out with me, if they have to, just to cheer me up.
theres my sister, my bestfriend. its like having a twin sister and a brother in one, only better. ^^ our age difference was obvious when we were kids but now that weve grown were always mistaken as twins.and in some sense we are. we share beds (we have two separate beds but when i started college, we just loved sleeping with each other that we decided we dont need the other bed), shoes, clothes, bag, we share the same infantile crush on mark (starstruck)...the same talent sa pangookray...we both wallow in utterly depressing songs after a heart break...we both love ukay-ukay, and baguio's wagwagan...we share the same playlist...we are alike in many ways. and shes like a brother to me, only cooler because i know she can protect me and she understands as well as i do that one can never have too many bags or shoes (hehe ^^) and much more.
and mama's my friend too...we fight a lot but i tell her things you dont usually tell mom. like how i fear ill die an old maid. she'd also tease me about my crushes. like even when it was over, shed still tease me about this guy i used to like who's a son of their friend. haha. and..hehe..whenever Ate and i buy something new that we dont really need...like a shoe or a bag..she'd tolerate us and would even help us hide it from papa because we know just how he'd react.
and eunie. my bestfirend since ages ago. we were inseparable in high school. we both have our own lockers but half of her things are in mine and half of my things are in hers. and she'd bring me food for lunch, while i buy us drinks. maybe that was why i was too skinny in high school because i only share lunch with her. i dont think ive ever kept anything from her. she knows me all too well. we have friendship necklace, friendship rings, friendship bracelets, and friendship toys...^^ but even if we dont have those things to remind me that were "engaged" to each other..well always be bestfriends.
cathe and sab. my other two bestfriends in high school. is it enough to say that cathe and i are soOo friends that for her mama, im like her second daughter? of all my friend's parents, she's the only one who never forgets to give me a present on my birthday ^^. and she'd tell cath she misses me. hehe. and Sab. well she has an active lovelife since high school so i dont get to spend too much time with her like i do with eunie but shes special to me anyway. and i got three mails form her telling me she misses me.
and ruthie...my first year in college wouldnt be the same without her. the first time i met her, we clicked in an instant. weve probably spent too much time together that ive acquired the way she walks too slow...but ever since we both shifted courses, i started walking faster again. this girl loves ukay like i do. she taught me to be girly...skirt, dangling earrings, lipgloss and all. we bought this shirt that we'd wear at the same day. were silly. and we'd have skirt days at school too. ive had too many firsts with her. my first time to ride a shipboat (in two days, i shared a cabin with her ^^) and a plane with a friend was with her. the first time i slept in a hotel room with my friend and her dad, was with her. okay i hope her dad doesnt read this because i am just about to say that i almost stayed up all night that time because her dad snores too loud. ^^ ruthie and i also share some dreams together. someday we plan to put up this boutique we'd call Junkshop that sells all the coolest second hand stuff and some things we made ourselves. and if i remember it right, i think we both want to put up an orphanage or any organization that does social work. ^^ she's like a sister to me ^^
then there's my econ barkada. patty tp, rox dewberry, atoy kalaban, tinai tinatot, katie kate, rhon dearie, j.Lo, and l-mae. ive no pretensions when im with them...i mean im very comfortable being the bubbly me around them because theyre like home to me. and i dont mind making those laborious beaded lipovitan bottles for them. its a bit scary going back to university after this exchange student program because my "home" in econ has graduated already. well at least i still have patty tp with me. ^^
then there's ate gigay and ate yohwee. the best boardmates ever. ate gigay and i are like friends since our past lives because when i first saw her, it was dejavu. i knew ive seen her already but thats just not possible. then after being friends for months we talked about the first time we met, and she confessed that she also felt like she's seen me before. i even get my period at exactly one day later than her first day. ^^ and ate yohwee...she helps me make sense of things when my minds all messed up. and she taught me how to love reading. ^^
john and janice. ^^ my two other super friends. we celebrate our monthsary every 13th day of each month and our anniversaries every 13th of june. ^^
mohn and ricky and angel. ^^ mohn, my frosty the biggie...my best gay friend ever. he and ricky almost killed me when we were swinging in one huge swing at UP one time and they got carried away by the fun of swinging that they almost knocked me over to my death. ^^ theres never a dull moment with mohn. he was one of the people who i think would never give up on me. like in high school, we had a special school play that he was directing and i was going to play the female lead role but something annoyed me that i suddenly wanted to quit...i got soOo pissed off that i ran from our practice screaming that i dont wanna play my part anymore and he ran after me all the way to Cubao. i thought he gave up following me until i reached home and found him and the rest of the cast in my home! ^^ and angel...her sis is my ate and my ate is her pseudo sis. and well ricky...were friends that he could go to my home just to have lunch if he likes (coz my homes only 15 or 20 minutes away from our university) ^^.
mommy marie too. ^^ shes actually younger than me but my sister and i call her mommy. we are each other's listening ears when were all systems down. i only met her just two years ago in a yfc summer camp but it felt like weve been friends like forever. ^^ i love crying it all out to her when im all sad, and she returns the favor. it broke my heart when her dad died. sigh. *no sad stories here*
there's also fhilcar. im her fries and shes my sundae. i am sometimes mean to her but i dont know why she can still be too patient to me. she lived in my home for two months for summer class in manila but weve been friends since first year college. she even goes to visit my family without me knowing...i guess i cant shut her out of my life now, even if i want to can i? just kidding. ^^ sundae's special too.
and Lea..^^ my tuesday. we'd hang out outside our univ's chapel and sit down on the floor outside and just listen to each others stories. i met her one summer, she was in my sociology 101 class...we just kind of clicked since then.
there's nikki. one of my ego masahistas. we rarely see each other now because im always m.i.a. in yfc but on the rare occassions that i see her, we always scream (in a nice and not so loud kind of way) out of happiness at seeing each other..and of course we hug. ive never even had a boyfriend yet or dated and yet she trusts my opinions and my advice...she trusts what i tell her. i remember having super late night conversations with her through text abou t her jason. when i come home, i have to make it up to her. hey nikks im still keeping my number.
i also have munchkin (we call each other munchkin), and this friend who i call creamy and who calls me crown (at mister donut they had this special donut they call creamy crown ^^), and one who i call and who calls me peps (short for pepsi, although i like coke better)...^^
i even had a pseudo younger brother. sigh. but i rarely talk to him now too. funny how it started. i used to be one of his high school crushes. and he got my email address from a forwarded mail one time. it was a shock that he liked me coz he's really cute and my gay best friend used to like him. but were pseudo brothers now. ^^
im also friends with my aunt. my uncle's wife. i cant remember how many times weve cried together because were watching a really heart wrenching movie, or were listening to a really touching song...or we just decided to go visit memory lane once again. shes my crying and yasui-stuff shopping buddy. and i happen to like most of the songs she likes...im an old-song person myself ^^.
and my new very dear friends here. ^^ and shang shang too.
after writing all these, i realized i am one lucky girl for having all these great people in my life. and yeah...im also friends with papa. he'd drive really fast at Edsa and take over some buses and it makes me panic a bit, then he'd tell me to not follow what he's doing...i'd just smile. one night after taking ate to her friends' home for a study sleep over, i was driving at Commonwealth and as it was really late at night and there were only a few cars on the road...he was half asleep and kind of woke up and panicked a little when he saw me driving and not looking on the road because i was busy checking the speed meter if ive reached 100 km/hour already. ^^ we make each other panic ^^ he also knows some of my crushes, its like a family secret.
technically, there should only be one bestfriend. because its the best so there should only be one. but i guess one can never really rank friends because they are special in their own ways. amazing isnt it...i mean, our hearts capacity to love. youll never run out of it. you can always care more and love more. imagine how i managed to stack all these people in my heart?
must be fate, or serendipity, or some unknown forces that brought all these people to me...but i know that friendship doesnt happen in a snap. it needs you to see through people's physical appearance...it needs you to be ready to open up to people...then if youre lucky, theyd open up to you too. and it needs you to not give up at the first sign of irritable personalities because more often than not, people are not what they seem on the outside. you become friends with someone when he/she starts sharing things he/she doesnt usually tell other people...and you become close friends when you find yourself knowing not just his/her secrets but his/her dreams, fears, or the things that make him/her laugh and cry...^^. its all worth all the pains (^^) of making and keeping friends.
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Where did you find it? Interesting read video editing programs
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(hehehehe...in random order...^_^)
(hehehehe...in random order...^_^)
|How to make a Falling Star|
1/2 cup of naivety
3/4 cup of laughter
1/4 cup & 1 tsp. of insecurity
Combine in a tall glass half filled with crushed ice. Add a little cocktail umbrella and a dash of sadness. Sprinkle a bit of craziness (it's not complete without that!). Serve chilled with a smile. And recently, i discovered that if you add a pinch of faith, it'll be a lot better. Yum!*Do not overindulge!*
When i lost you, I was the one who loved you most, but between us you lost more. For someday I can love someone the way that i loved you but you will never be loved again the way that i did...
everything happens for a reason, nothing happens by chance or by means of good luck. illness, injury, failures, love lost, memories of true greatness and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of one's soul. without the small tests, whatever they may be, life would be like a smoothly paved straight flat road to nowhere. it would be safe and comfortable but uttery pointless...
do not undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others, it is because we are different that each of us is special...
do not let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past or for the future. by living your life, one day at a time, you live all the days of your life...
do not be afraid to encounter risks, it is by taking risks that we learn how to be brave...
do not run through life so fast that you forget, not only where you have been, but also where you are going...
Humankind get bored with childhood, they rush to grow up, and then long to be children again...
We cannot make anyone love us. All we can do is let ourselves be loved.
"If the sight of the blue skies fills you with joy, if the simple things of nature have a message that you understand, rejoice, for your soul is alive." - Eleonora Duse
"This is courage...to bear unflinchingly what heaven sends." - Euripedes
"Hope is faith holding out its hand in the dark." - George Iles
The hardest thing to do is to watch someone you love, love someone else.
Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, then its not the end.
Nobody is perfect until you fall in love with them.
Men are not worthy of precious tears, they just make us look terrible...
Its amazing the things you realize when you lose someone; you get mad at yourself for not saying the things you could've a million times, you take for grantd the days doing nothing when you could have been with them. anyone can be taken at anytime in our lives, but we always wait until theyre gone to say the things we never had the courage to before
Watching you walk out of my life hasn't made me bitter or cynical about love, but rather, it has shown me that if i wanted so badly to be with the wrong person, how beautiful it will be when the right one comes along...